Gene Simmons has once again proven he’s not just the Demon of Rock… he’s the CEO of Merchandising.
Yep, the man who made more money off face paint than most artists make from entire discographies is now charging fans up to $1,200—yes, twelve hundred American dollars—for an autograph experience.
Gene Simmons, co-founder of KISS, fire-spitter, tongue-slinger, and unofficial President of Capitalism, is hitting up fan expos this year. But he’s not just showing up for a quick handshake and a Sharpie moment.
Gene is rolling out fan packages, with different prices. You get the autograph, the photo op, probably a few seconds of small talk and if you’re lucky, a flash of that reptilian tongue like it’s 1977 and you’re backstage at Cobo Hall.
But don’t worry, there are lower-tier packages, too. You know, for the peasants who only want one signed item instead of three and don’t need Gene to breathe on them personally.
Well, that depends. If you’re a KISS mega-fan, this is Mecca. Gene isn’t just a bassist in platform boots—he’s a walking brand. He once trademarked the devil horns, for crying out loud. You don’t meet Gene Simmons. You license the experience.
But here’s where it gets weird: Gene’s actually really good with fans.
For all the price-tag drama, people who attend these events say he’s shockingly approachable. He’ll give thoughtful answers during Q&A sessions. He won’t rush you through the line like you’re buying groceries. He doesn’t half-ass the signature. It’s not a cash grab in the lazy sense, it’s a cash grab with effort.
And if you’re gonna spend money on a rock legend, better the one who literally tells you he’s doing it for the money than the ones who pretend it’s all for the “art.”
So, would you pay $1,200 for a Gene Simmons autograph?
